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A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye
dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging
the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks,
"What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just
looking around."
A nun in the convent walked into the bathroom where
mother superior was taking a shower. "There is a blind man
to see you," she says. "Well, if he is a blind man,
than it does not matter if I'm in the shower. Send him in."
The blind man walks into the bathroom, and mother superior starts
to tell him how much she appreciates him working at the convent
for them. She goes on and on and 10 minutes later the man interrupts:
"That's nice and all, ma'am, but you can put your clothes
on now. Where do you want me to put these blinds?
There once was a blind man who decided to visit
Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said,
"Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered,
"Everything is big in Texas." When he finally arrived
in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar,
he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed,
"Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything
is big in Texas." After a couple of beers, the blind man
asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender
replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed
for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the
second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to
the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident. Scared to
death, the blind man started shouting, "Don't flush, don't
flush!"
A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting.
When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were
all done for him: "I am placed in the door with my seeing
eye dog and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release
ring for me and out I go with the dog." "But how do
you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I
have a very keen sense of smell, and I can smell the trees and
grass when I am 300 feet from the ground" he answered. "But
how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on
the ground?" he was again asked. He quickly answered: "Oh,
the dog's leash goes slack."
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